December Daily

December 7

Today is like many days for us...facing the pink elephant in the room.  Cancer never leaves - it is there forever, some days the "elephant" is hiding behind something and you can barely catch a glimpse but some days it is there in full view staring you in the face. Today I got the STARE DOWN. Jason has been have some memory issues that have become more prevalent in the past weeks, a quick appointment just to be safe - and we pushed up the MRI and need to see neurologist to see what test or such can be done to see what we are facing. Is it re-occurrence, is it long term affect of radiation....we don't know - here is where the "elephant" stared me down. Dr. Trehan "we aren't sure what to do, Jason shouldn't be here", we can't read what to do next, most don't make it 5 years" - (GULP). One side of me says that's right, BOOYYYAAA - Jason is here - Praise to God - he is an example of the power - but the other side of me says GULP, GULP, GULP...blink fast...blink fast...hold it together. 

Ok, enough of that - go hide pink elephant....it is tree decorating time. Carson was so excited to put the "balls" on the tree. He thought it meant throwing the balls at the tree - too cute. We explained that we needed to hang them not throw them - so he just hung them all in one clump.  I let him have his fun, and then fixed it...ha ha. He even put the star on top - its crooked and that is the way it will stay. :)